Additional Logistics of the Home Retreat_1

Sure, you might say, that type of practice is doable at home, but what about trying to do it at one’s work and what about the feelings of others when all of a sudden I start acting a bit strange and doing things differently? I suggest you talk to your loved ones before the retreat and get them on board as far as they can.

On board doesn’t mean that they will do the retreat with you; it means that they know what you are doing and why. Let them know how valuable just their understanding is to the success of your retreat. You might tell them how important the retreat is for you, and explain in detail what you think will remain the same and how your behaviour will change. No surprises. Then watch your reactions in each interaction should someone do or not do what they said they would. It doesn’t matter. They are with you as far as they can be, and the rest is your responsibility to make your inner experience a field for sati-sampajañña. Allowing the opportunity to support you could soften any

resistance they might have to you taking care of yourself. Being in conversation with those you will affect might even help them learn how all of us have choices on how we live. Your family might step up and offer to help you in your retreat. They might not. In either case fill the role that your family and the situation offers with as much ease and grace as you can with as much inner sati-sampajañña as you can muster.

It is more difficult to maintain sati during meals if you live and eat with others. This is especially true if we are the caregivers. Meals will be more involved with less control due to the social situation. Should this be the case, it will be helpful to your practice to have some guidelines that can be discussed with your housemates/family before your retreat begins. Without planning and setting your expectations towards what can/can’t be done with others, meals will more likely undermine your continuity.

Sure, you might say, that type of practice is doable at home, but what about trying to do it at one’s work and what about the feelings of others when all of a sudden I start acting a bit strange and doing things differently? I suggest you talk to your loved ones before the retreat and get them on board as far as they can.

On board doesn’t mean that they will do the retreat with you; it means that they know what you are doing and why. Let them know how valuable just their understanding is to the success of your retreat. You might tell them how important the retreat is for you, and explain in detail what you think will remain the same and how your behaviour will change. No surprises. Then watch your reactions in each interaction should someone do or not do what they said they would. It doesn’t matter. They are with you as far as they can be, and the rest is your responsibility to make your inner experience a field for sati-sampajañña. Allowing the opportunity to support you could soften any resistance they might have to you taking care of yourself. Being in conversation with those you will affect might even help them learn how all of us have choices on how we live. Your family might step up and offer to help you in your retreat. They might not. In either case fill the role that your family and the situation offers with as much ease and grace as you can with as much inner sati-sampajañña as you can muster.

It is more difficult to maintain sati during meals if you live and eat with others. This is especially true if we are the caregivers. Meals will be more involved with less control due to the social situation. Should this be the case, it will be helpful to your practice to have some guidelines that can be discussed with your housemates/family before your retreat begins. Without planning and setting your expectations towards what can/can’t be done with others, meals will more likely undermine your continuity.

Home

Glossary

Right Intention (sammā-sankappa): The Noble Eightfold Path. Bhikkhu Bodhi. Chapter Three.

Munindraji: 1. Was an Indian lay teacher most often associated in the West as being Joseph Goldstein’s and Dipama’s teacher. His impact on how Theravada Buddhism is understood in the West cannot be overstated. In the book Living This Life Fully: Stories and Teachings of Munindra, 2010, by Mirka Knaster the reader is given a most extraordinary example of how to live a Home Retreat as a layperson. allan cooper.

Vikāla-bhojanā veramanī sikkhāpadam samādhiyāmi, I undertake the Precept to refrain from eating at the forbidden time (i.e., afternoon till the sun rises the next day). I will eat with an attention towards sustenance with applied mindfulness and clear comprehension during all drinking and eating.

See template in index.

Sati-sampajañña: 1. Sati and sampajañña are two terms combined to mean one thing. Sati is the function of the mind that can bring meditative focus on any conscious object and get to know it without self-referencing or preference. Sampajañña is the wholesome attempt to understand what an object is. Without sampajañña sati is simply a function of the mind without understanding. Sampajañña without sati is speculation. Combined these mental functions can de-condition and reorient the mind towards freedom from unwholesome patterns of mind, speech and action. allan cooper 2. Satipaṭṭhāna Sutta. MN:10.

Sampajañña: Clear Comprehension: 1. Attending to four categories of attention: Purpose, Suitability, Domain, and Reality. allan cooper. 2. The Heart of Buddhist Meditation, Nyanaponika Thera. 3. Satipaṭṭhāna Sutta. MN:10.

Spiritual friend (kalyānamitta): 1. SN 45:2 Upaddha Sutta. 2. Access to Insight, Admirable Friendship: kalyanamitta. 3. In common usage ‘a spiritual friend.’ In a traditional sense it means a teacher or a knower of the way. allan cooper

Right View (sammā-ditthi): 1. The Noble Eightfold Path: Way to the End of Suffering, Chapter Two. Bhikkhu Bodhi.

Abbreviations in footnotes: AN: Aṅguttara Nikāya, DN: Dingha Nikāya, MN: Majjhima Nikāya, SN: Saṃyutta Nikāya